Thursday, February 26, 2009

Hellooo? Helllooo?

I'm back and before we get into anything, I just have to say that I'm a bit concerned because I just saw the Jonas Brothers movie preview and I sorta want to see the movie.

Oh dear. I don't even know the difference between the three of them, although I did learn when they were on the Ellen Degeneres show that they always have to stand and sit in that order. Which is just too weird, really. But the movie...

It's 3D!!! Can you ever really go wrong with a 3D movie? Actually, yes, and the answer is the Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana movie, which is also coming out very soon, too.

Even if that movie was in 3D I would NOT want to see it (although I DO want this dress. So cute!) And I do sort of want to know the answer to the pressing question: Is this the end of Hannah Montana? Because the movie REALLY makes it seem that way. Like from now on it's going to be all Miley all the time. 

The other question I really want to know the answer to is: What is the crazy dramatic thing that's so crazy and dramatic that they can't even have a studio audience on the After the Final Rose on The Bachelor next week??? Because I cannot reveal my sources (OK I can -- this photographer I know who is so amazing and shoots in NY all the time told me) that apparently....


Jason proposes to Melissa (which actually I already knew because of the crazy Canadian guy who figured it out and posted it on YouTube after the very first episode...note the pinky ring, which Melissa wears) but THEN, you know how after they finish filming and everyone goes back home and has to be quiet and good until the show finishes airing? Well, during that quiet-at-home-by-yourself-being-good-time Jason is not at all home by himself being quiet or being good. Oh no. You know what he's doing? Sneaking off to hook up with Molly! And apparently, she's pregnant! With his child! Out of final rose wedlock! How's that for de-flowering? 

Do we believe it? I don't know what to believe.

One thing I do believe is that I loved Kathy Griffin on Privileged this week!

Seacrest, out!

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

It's already Wednesday!

I know! This is why you come to this blog -- for breaking news like what day of the week it is!
But really, this is why I love a three-day weekend. Especially one that included both Valentine's Day and Family Day. Although I have to say, calling a holiday FAMILY DAY feels like so much pressure. Like, YOU MUST HANG OUT WITH YOUR FAMILY. Or else. Or else what? What about if your family lives 50,000 miles away? Or in another country? What then? You have to go to work? Or be sad?

And there's so much pressure to do something so extraordinary with your day off. Whereas with say, Easter Monday, well you just eat more chocolate. Or Boxing Day, you shop or play with your Christmas presents.

Anyway, I spent Family Day doing what any faithful Jason-Melissa supporter would do: watching The Bachelor. And screaming at the TV over Molly leaving her bag behind on the date. (It's the same un-reality that The City has. Have any of them ever paid a bill before leaving a restaurant?).

As for V-day, I'm usually not really into the holiday.

It's a little commercial, and I like to show the love on other days of the year instead.

So to make no big deal of the day the Hubs and I made plans with a guy friend to go out for beers (fruity cocktail for me) and ribs (pasta or pizza for me) and a movie (something with guns, martial arts, aliens or all of the above if the boys had their way). But instead, things turned out differently.

Beers (and a fruity cocktail for me)? Check.

Ribs (and poutine for me)? Check.


There's nothing cuter than two boys insisting on seeing a girly movie, just because it's Valentine's Day. (Even if they did have to order a last-minute extra round of beers before we headed to the theatre).

Unfortunately, I was disappointed. I'm not going to spoil the movie if you haven't seen it, but let's just say it was way different than the book. And I really loved the book. I remember laughing on practically every page, and I just didn't laugh that many times in the movie.

After the movie was over and I relayed my disappointment, he said: Did you just not like it because Colin Firth didn't play the boyfriend?

Me: Of course not! (Totally lying).

I mean, of course Colin Firth cannot play the handsome British boyfriend in every movie.

I know that.

I do.

But this guy?

I really just could not believe him as the super-successful, super-refined, super-serious, super-rich love interest.

But this guy....

"Oh Becky Bloomwood! I love you!" Smooch. smooch. smooch. Totally believable.

I'm sorry! Sue me! Yes! I admit it! I wish Colin Firth would've been cast as Luke Brandon. He would've been perfect. (Even if he might very well be twice Isla Fisher's age. Who cares?!) All would've been perfect.

Did you see it? What did you think?

Monday, February 9, 2009

You Asked, I Answer

Every so often I get emails from aspiring writers, friends, family and perfect strangers asking questions about writing, the publishing world, agents and how Mr. Baz is doing (okay that last one is a stretch, but he's doing very well, thank you very much). I'm always surprised that someone thinks that I'm an expert on anything to do with writing. Most of the time I have no clue how anything works. Really. I'm no expert. Sure, I have an agent, and a publisher and an editor and a publicist, but mostly they all take care of everything and I just sit in confusion at how it all works.

But I'm always excited when someone says they have a book idea and wants advice, and I try to answer them the best I can. So then I thought, why not give the answers here? So from time to time, I'll post questions and my responses here.

Question: I have a book idea. Can I sell the idea or do I have to write the entire book?

Good question! In my dream world, I could send my agent a quick one-line email telling her about my book idea, and she would immediately write back and tell me Fabulous idea! I'll sell it! Then, she'd email her favourite editor and tell her the idea and that editor would email back: Love it! We'll take it!

And then I'd buy myself a pretty new dress and sit down to write.

Sadly, it doesn't really work that way. When I wanted to write Stuck in Downward Dog, I had to write the entire novel. Then, I sent it out to several agents and then sat on the couch with my toes crossed eating jujubes hoping an agent would call and want to represent me. And then, one did. Hurrah! Then, I had to revise and revise and then eventually my agent sent it out to publishers and then eventually one bought it. And then I had to revise some more.

While writing my second novel, Love Struck, I was luckier. I came up with the idea and wrote a synopsis. My agent showed it to my editor. She loved it and I wrote a chapter outline and a couple of chapters and we gave it back to my editor. She and my publisher loved it and made me an offer, which was one of the best days ever. Then I bought myself a cute dress...

... hung it in the closet, put on my sweatpants and wrote the rest of my novel in a couple of weeks. This was ideal, though you do actually have to write the book, since once they've bought it, they'd ideally like for the book to come out in the next century.

For non-fiction, it's different. You really can write a proposal and not the book. Usually it's several pages long (up to 40) and includes a synopsis, table of contents, chapter outline, source list, and a bit about you as the author and why you're the best person to write the book (for example, you want to write a book about video games, and you had to write this proposal when you were supposed to be sleeping because you spend all your waking hours playing video games). Then, you submit all of the above to an agent or publisher and then hopefully get an offer, then buy yourself whatever makes you happy (such as a new video game or a pretty dress!) to celebrate and then write the book.

Have a question? Email me or leave it in the comments and I'll answer!