Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Can you spot the difference?

The other day I was reading Jennifer Weiner's blog and she mentioned how alike these two above book covers are, which is one of my favourite games. It's sort of like Go Fish with book covers, so let's play...

I loved both books. I'm sure you know what In her Shoes is all about. If you haven't read Six Weeks to Toxic, I highly recommend it, and not just because author Louisa McCormack is Canadian and my publisher-mate, but because the book is actually original and witty and fun, and you know the ending before you start, which makes it one of those stories that's all about the story in itself, not as a means to an end. Louisa's second book comes out in Fall 08, and is called The Catch. Set in PEI, she's dubbing it Anne of Green Gables with sex. Love it.

When I saw this book...

I couldn't help thinking about this book...

I haven't read The Opposable Mind (though I love the title and cover) but I'm pretty sure there's not a huge crossover readership.

Then, of course, there is the YA headless teen cover phenomena...

I could go on,  but I think you get the idea. I'm not sure why there are so many headless teens on YA covers. Bad hair days? Zits? Or is it that readers can relate better if they imagine the heroine as themselves? 

When my publisher was designing the cover for Stuck in Downward Dog, one of the options was a headless girl. We nixed it because we felt the book would end up looking like YA and we didn't want readers to be confused. 

Still, are similar covers a good thing or a bad thing? Do two (or more) similar covers create a sense of familiarity so that a reader picks the book up, feeling like she keeps seeing it everywhere? In advertising, there's a theory that the more someone sees the same ad over and over, the more she begins to like it. So if the same theory can be applied to books, are the similar covers helping each other to get noticed and purchased? Or, is the not-as-well-known cover playing off the more well-known cover? That's what I wonder whenever I see this book...

Which, at first glance from outside the bookstore, I always think is mine, mostly because the cover colour is almost identical, and then get really excited that there's a whole stack of them on the table when you walk in the door. Until I realize it is not my book, and that there is the potential that someone will pick up my book, thinking it's Sophie's bestseller, only to be very disappointed. Which would really suck. It would be much better if someone thought she was picking up a boring-ass business book that her boss recommended she read, only to realize she'd bought my book by mistake, and then was so pleasantly surprised and ended up loving it. 

Unfortunately, I don't know many boring-ass business book covers that have an illustrated girl with a handbag full of pretty products spilling out of it. Too bad. 

Monday, January 28, 2008

Mr. Rooter is not so sexy or smart...

Mr Rooter, though a man in uniform, sucks. Because remember how he said "Trade for trade?" and then promised that if I bought the fake Drain-O, he would give me the name of his plumber friend who would solve my boring-ass shower problems? Well, what he REALLY meant was "Buy my fake Drain-O for $75 and I will laugh all way to the bank because I don't have a special plumber friend. Ha ha ha."

Luckily I used my Nancy Drew spy skills to find the cartridge myself, which involved calling the store, and then emailing them pictures and then them telling me they no longer carry that line but that I could call the distributor, which I did and coerced them to sell me the part at cost, if I came with cash to the back door. It was all very spy-like and I felt very much like I was on an undercover mission. I even used a code word - Splancy - but the girl just stared at me. Still, she gave me the cartridge, which was cool, though the actual cartridge didn't look as cool as I'd envisioned. It sort of looks like it might be a handheld time machine, but it has not stopped time - no, four weeks have still now passed since my shower started dripping.

The good thing was that she also gave me the number of a plumber and he actually answered his phone and said he would only charge me only $80 and would put in the part last Thursday, only last Thursday turned out to be today at 2 pm and then he called at 8 am and said he was at my door. Interesting scope of time, but I'm not complaining because he's here.

Only, he seems more interested in showing me his tools. Like, look, I have sexy tools. Do you like my sexy tools? Do you want to kiss my sexy tools?

But really, I don't care, I just want him to leave me alone while he fixes the shower! But I am smiling so that he thinks I care so that he will fix the shower. He has just told me that I need some tool to turn off the water. Shouldn't he have this? He does, actually, in his van, but he wants me to have one too.

Me: I don't have that tool.
He: You need it.
Me: Don't you have one?
He: Yes. But you should have one. What if you have a water leak and you need to turn off the water?
Me: I do have a water leak. That's why I called you.
He: But what if you have a pipe burst and there's water everywhere?
Me: I call the super and he'll turn it off.
He: But what if he isn't here? Then what?
Me: I don't know. I cry? (I am thinking this but not saying it, obviously because when you're dealing with tradespeople you have to be strong. You can't cry or they will swindle you. Unless they are already swindling you, in which case, crying is a very valid option. I've tried it. It works. I should've used it on Mr. Rooter with his whole "trade for trade" scam, but I didn't, but back to the story)...
He: See why you need the tool?
Me: Yes, Yes, I need the tool. Now can you fix the shower?
He: No. You need a rubber insert. You're missing the rubber insert. It's still leaking.
Me: But you said all I needed was the time-travel machine. Why did I just spend $120 on the time travel machine?
He: You need that too. And the rubber insert. I'll be back.

He says he'll be back tomorrow, which could be February or 2011. I'm not sure. However, I'm getting used to the leaking sound. It's sort of like a waterfall, which makes me feel like I'm in Borneo. Or Niagara Falls.

Friday, January 25, 2008

Oh Josh Holloway you are so hot...

As you know if you read this blog, I've recently started watching LOST. Yes, I know I'm like 3 years behind, but at least it's not in syndication yet (which is when I started watching Seinfeld, but anyway...). LOST Season 4 starts on Thursday, which means I have exactly 5 days to finish watching 12 episodes, which is totally possible if only I didn't stop getting distracted by...

Our band name is Deathknell and the Pussycat (I'm the pussycat, obviously) and we have a band logo and I have a cute pink outfit and great hair and I play drums. I rock the drums. Kind of. Because now we've toured to as many cities as we can and we have a roadie and a tour bus and a manager but we need a PR firm so that we can play more gigs in Stockholm but the only way to do so is to get more fans and we can only get more fans if we play on Hard. And Hard is TOTALLY HARD. Like I can only play about two stanzas before I get booed off. But drumming is so hard! You have to push the pedally thing and I have shin splints and it hurts so bad that I have to wear my drumming sneaker. Which happens to be pink and helps, except when I start daydreaming about Josh Holloway and thinking about how if he could come over and massage my leg maybe it would feel better. 

Unfortunately, he's too busy being kissy-mad* at Kate at the moment.

*Kissy-mad is when you're mad at someone but it's really because you looooove them and want to kiss them and because you're fighting you can't kiss and that makes you mad. 

I've been trying not to think about him so I can focus on getting more fans, but then yesterday I got a press release with this picture...

I am the power of cool and I don't even have to shave or cut my hair.

Come. On. How am I supposed to concentrate on anything else? I can't. I keep staring at him. I love him. Also, there's a small chance he'll come here to do press for his new cologne, "Eau de Hotness", so then he'll finally meet me and move here from Hawaii. Who needs Sawyer on the show when I can have him be my bass player in the band?

I'll keep you posted on the progress.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

I am so not OM....

Our shower faucet is leaking, which is just about the most boring type of household dilemma one can have unless you're Mr. Baz, who is totally amazed by the sound of running water coming from within the tiny room that is inside the bathroom. He stares, mesmerized by it every morning, as if it's a new thing, which it's not because it's now been three weeks of steadily running water. I know, tie me to a tree, I'm killing the earth with my excess water but really I'm TRYING to fix the problem, but I can't.

First, I called a plumber, but he took three weeks to finally call me back to tell me that he has to order the part but forgot what the shower looked like (apparently! it's been so long! who can blame him?), so now he wants to come back to take a picture of the shower. Forget it. Shouldn't he have taken a picture the first time instead of just staring at it? Didn't he go to second grade like the rest of us?

I called Mr. Rooter instead. I like a man in uniform. And a free estimate. Only Mr. Rooter said our faucet was too fancy shmancy for him to fix, so he told me the name of his "friend" who could fix it. Then he tried to sell me some fancy Mr. Rooter version of Drain-0 that cost like $17,000 (because it's fancy and is much better. So he has fancy Drain-O but he can't fix a fancy faucet. It seems like a double-standard to me). So then he said, slyly, "Trade for trade?" So my free estimate wasn't so free after all, was it? I'm such a sucker because I figured if I didn't buy the fancy Drain-O he wouldn't actually call his friend.

I wish I could fix it myself but I checked out Plumbing for Dummies, but I think I'm too much of a dummy to figure it out. Actually, it didn't look that hard. There were only 7 steps, and pictures to follow, but then it estimates the time it will take you to fix the problem and it said "1 day". What?! 1 day for 7 steps? That seems ridiculous. Although I suppose it takes people like 2 years to get through the 12 steps of addiction, so maybe it's not that long in comparison, but I fear I will have a drinking or pill problem if I have to deal with this leaky faucet for much longer, so it doesn't seem worth it.

Friday, January 18, 2008

What I learned from my (old) school today...

Yesterday, I did an interview with a student reporter for The Eyeopener, the independent campus newspaper at Ryerson and today, the photographer came to take my picture. At first, she suggested perhaps she could take my picture at a yoga studio. Doing yoga. In yoga clothes.

Cute idea right?

NO, NOT A CUTE IDEA. I mean, it's traumatic enough for me to see myself in spandex. As if I'd let a stranger see me and then TAKE MY PICTURE. And then print it. So I faked hermititis (an allergic reaction to leaving the house) and made the photographer come to my place so that I could wear normal author clothes, like a normal author.

Because she was very sweet, she somehow she still convinced me to sit in lotus position (like the cover of SIDD). But I'm wearing jeans. And a pretty new bracelet my friend brought me back from Thailand that matched my purple yoga mat. So it's sort of OM. It's home-om. Let's hope I don't look hideous.

Anyway, after she left I decided to check out the newspaper online to see what's new at my old school.

Which is when I saw this story: RA Strangles student in residence.

I learned that not only did this student get strangled (he's okay now), but in October, another student stabbed her roommate in the residence. Then six girls got groped at a floor party and then in December, a girl died in her room.

In ONE semester?

But the best part (and when I say best I mean as in ridiculous) is the end of the story, when they talk to the rez housing manager:

Despite the recent events, Weppler says that this year hasn’t been too different from others.“At this point, I don’t have any inclination to point to things as abnormal,” he said.

Is this what's going on in residence now everywhere? And is the claim that this is "normal" supposed to make students (and their parents) feel better? The worst thing that happened when I lived in rez was that a girl got rushed to the hospital for puking her guts out while playing Century Club. But she got her stomach pumped and everyone loved her after that because she'd drank 100 beers. And then she got a hot boyfriend. Not that I'm saying getting your stomach pumped and getting a hot boyfriend are co-related. I'm just saying.

In other news, apparently Qi is not a word, idiot. Ha! I knew it! When I first got addicted to Scrabulous on Facebook, I tried to make big words, using all my letters. Actually if you use all your letters you get a Bingo so that's a good thing, but if you're even one letter short, then you likely only get like 8 points because you made the word on normal squares rather than utilizing the coloured squares. Or maybe it's just me. Anyway, I totally lost at like a hundred Scrabulous games, until I figured out that I shouldn't try to make words I actually know the meaning of, but instead, make words like Qi, Fe, AA, El and Er. Because those are the words, that, in the right place, make you lots of points! But what's the point in that? And what's the point of Scrabulous anyway when you have to make words like that? It's totally making me an idiot. I can't formulate coherent sentences anymore because I'm too busy trying to think of two-letter words to answer people's questions in life.

Which is why I've now put a ban on Scranbulous. I'm sorry if you're waiting for me to make my move on Facebook so that you can put down your Bingo. It's not going to happen. I have other things to do. Like go back to brushing my hair 100 times to make it grow faster.

Oh yes it totally works, so don't laugh.

Saturday, January 12, 2008

It may be 1994.

If you are listening to the radio and waiting to hear some Counting Crows or Sheryl Crow and wondering why you're not hearing it, I'll tell you. Because it's not 1994. But maybe you think it is. But it's not.

Let's go back to Friday afternoon.

Sometimes, I get free haircuts. This is the perk of working at a beauty magazine, and I'm not complaining. But sometimes, this can be a bad thing.

Usually it's the senior stylist or owner of the salon who cuts my hair, as part of the event I'm at. Which means for a couple of months I have a haircut I love. A haircut I could never afford. Until a few months pass, and then, I have split ends, frizz and general misconduct at the top of my head. And I need another haircut.

If I'm lucky, I can hold out until another event. Otherwise, I need to pay to get my hair cut, which I'm fine with (sort of), except that the best things in life sometimes are free and because I get a lot of cuts from a lot of different stylists I don't have a regular stylist so whenever I have to pay, my indecision rears it ugly head and I can't figure out where to go. I've tried to find one that I could stick with (and who wouldn't give me a mullet for going to someone else every once in a while because it's free), but I've never found one I love. To love him, he must meet five criteria:

a) be a man (I'm convinced women try to make other women look bad)

b) have a likeable personality (funny but don't ask five billion work questions)

c) give me a good haircut (and don't try to convince me to get a buzz cut)

d) not cost seventeen thousand dollars

e) be in a convenient location. I am lazy and I like things to be near home or work or I will not go.

I have yet to find a hairstylist who meets all five criteria.

So last week I wore my hair up five days in a row, a sure sign it was time for a cut. My hair was practically reaching my waistband when I wore high waisted pants. I am not a hippie and my hippie hair needed to go.

I wanted to go back to the guy I went to about six months ago, who I loved, but he charged $225. For a cut and style. I'm not joking. I cannot afford this. I cannot afford anything that costs $225 unless it was a brand new car.

My second choice was another senior stylist at another salon who I really liked too. I called and asked his price: $125. Still, this is just too much. I have long hair. It's easy to cut. I really don't think I should have to pay $125 for a haircut. This, to me, is a good pair of shoes, which will last longer than six weeks.

There was another stylist who once styled my hair and cut my bangs (but not my hair) that I liked, and he only charged $75, but was located on Queen West, which isn't in my hood and I didn't think I could commit to going out there for my haircuts, especially if I wasn't sure he would give me a good cut.

I should've gone to him.

Instead I asked my editor friend, who knows his hairstylists. He recommended the owner of a salon that was halfway between work and home. Perfect location, and when he called for the price, it was $55. I couldn't believe my luck. I even got an appointment the very next day. It should've been a sign.

I was so set on the location and price that I failed to put any weight in the fact that it was my editor friend's old bald friend who loved the hairstylist. What kind of criteria is an old bad guy looking for in a hairstylist?

So I went.

I should've known right from the start it would be bad. I told him what I wanted him to do. Then he asked me what was the shortest I'd ever worn my hair. I told him I'd had a boy cut when I was 10. I looked like a boy. And I'd had a bob in university. I looked like a boy. So if he could please just give me the haircut I asked for, I would be very happy. It's not as if I was asking him to trim a mere 1/4". I was letting him cut off at least six inches from the back, maybe more. I wasn't holding his scissors back, I just didn't want to look like Demi Moore in GI Jane.

And now, I have the Rachel.

Yesterday, I tried to pull on it to make it straighter in the hopes that the layers would stop flipping out, but they would not cooperate. So then I tried to curl them, but the curls just made the flippy layers more flippy and layered. I put it in a ponytail. It was the Rachel in a ponytail.

I have nothing against the Rachel. It was a fine cut. I had it.

In 1994.

I do not want the Rachel now. I do not want my hair in syndication. I want my hair on HBO. To have 1994 hair is like reverting in time. I feel like I should put on dress with tights and Doc Martin boots.

I would've stayed in all weekend, but I had to go out. As I walked down Yonge Street I could see people staring and I know what they were thinking: "Did I just time travel when I crossed Bloor Street? Is it 1994?"

If you have felt that way this weekend, you have not time travelled. You just witnessed my hair. I'm very sorry for you.

But selfishly, I'm sorrier for me.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

If I ask the answer first, is there still reason for a question?

For Christmas, my dad gave my stepmom Jeopardy on DVD for her computer. My stepmom is an avid Jeopardy player and she can ask most of the questions correctly when watching the show, so she was stoked. Three days after Christmas, she'd racked up more than $40,000 and was already fake-shopping with her winnings. They're now on some sunny beach. They told me what country they are in but I have chosen to wipe it from my brain because it is really just too depressing to think about, while I'm here in the cold. Anyway, I just hope she doesn't go to the beach wearing a new "swimsuit" she "purchased." Before they left, my dad, ever the thrift-king, discovered that you could load the game on to many computers so he gave it to me for my own computer. Then, he sent me an email saying, oh, by the way, you first have to download some patch off the internet. I have a sneaking suspicion that when he said that we could load the game on many computers, we're not really supposed to. I haven't loaded the game yet and I think it may be because:

a) my computer was sick (by the way, he came home yesterday and is in top form! a full recovery! no antibiotics required, which is a good thing because I can't remember to take my vitamins, so I'm afraid if my computer needed antibiotics he would be out of luck). 

or perhaps, it could be that

b) I'm already deep in the trenches of an ethical war against pirated DVDs and our friends keep buying them at the Pacific Mall and leaving them at our place, taunting me until I watch them. I mean, I have willpower, but it's like putting a chocolate on my pillow before bed. Am I supposed to just SLEEP on top of the chocolate until I get a dent in my head, or eat it and then sleep well? And I know the Jeopardy game isn't pirated, but maybe you're not supposed to play it on more than one computer? 

but really, I think the real reason is that 

c) I, unlike my stepmom, am very good at asking questions, but only to answers that I DON'T know. I'm not very good at asking questions to answers I DO know. I don't know the answers to a lot of questions, which are actually questions, unlike Jeopardy questions, which have you ever realized are not really questions at all, since you could not actually give an accurate answer if you asked the question first? Unless it was something like: 
Q: What is Mount Kiliminjaro?
A: A mountain.
Anyway, here are my real questions. If you have real answers, send them:

1. When is The Hills back on? And are Speidi still together? I heard they got a Christmas tree. That is sucky.

2. What happened to The Riches? I miss Minnie and also the boy/girl child. 

3. My nails are very dry and breakable. Is it better to put nail polish on them to protect them, or will that just dry them out more and form a barrier to the hand & nail creams I'm applying? In other words, is it better to polish or not? 

That is all. 

If you have questions, feel free to send them too. I won't have answers though. Just so you know.

Monday, January 7, 2008

I've decided to commit to being fat.

Because it's a new year I thought perhaps I should get onto some sort of diet plan or fitness plan that involved more than just walking to the video store to rent Season 2 of LOST (yes, I've committed and because everyone said it wasn't that good I had ZERO expectations and totally thought the hatch would be full of dead people or zebras or something dumb, so now I'm loving it, even if it's a bit slow). Anyway, I've noticed that all my clothes are shrinking even when I don't wash them and we have a beach wedding coming up and well, I don't have to explain why I don't want to wear one of those bathing suits with the ruffled bum to the beach, do I? So anyway, I thought about doing more hot yoga (when I say more, I mean, more than once every month or two) but one thing I don't like is that if I just did my hair then it gets totally sweaty so basically I have to wash it daily, which is really quite drying on your hair, and who wants dry hair? Do I want to sacrifice frizz for a fit body? So then I thought maybe I should just stop eating chocolate and candy on a daily basis but then on Friday I was all set to eat a grilled cheese sandwich for dinner  (because that's a totally healthy dinner, especially when you use processed cheese slices) while watching LOST. But then, the Hubs said, Let's have pie for dinner, but I didn't really feel like pie so he had pie and I instead had marshmallow-crunch ice cream and chocolate chip cookies. And then I realized that I can commit to eating bad food and not working out much better than I can to eating salad and doing yoga every day. So I'm going to go with that. After all, I think the new year should be about recognizing one's strengths and improving them. 

So...what are your strengths? 

Thursday, January 3, 2008

Dead characters and sick computers.

Apparently, they DO kill off main characters on LOST. We finished Season 1, so now I want to know what's in the hatch, but I'm worried Season 2 it's going to be DUMB and totally UNBELIEVABLE and make me wish a plague on the island, or at least on my DVD player, which by the way is now a PlayStation (since it was Blu-Ray, the Hubs decided it could replace the DVD player). The problem with this is that  you have to use the PlayStation controller to make it work, and I can't figure it out, but it does make me feel like I'm cool and young trying to. Anyway, should I watch Season 2? Is it better than Season 1? Advice please. 

Anyway the death of _____ (I don't want to spoil it) made me sad but not as sad as if they'd killed off Jack, like they were originally going to, I learned when I watched the Special Features. Anyway, I learned my lesson, which is totally unoriginal, but true: Be careful what you wish for, and all that. As punishment perhaps for lying lying pants on firing, my computer, Wally, is sick. He refuses to turn on or recharge his batteries. I think he may be forming an allegiance with my cellphone, which doesn't ring. I'm not sure what's next - a toaster that doesn't toast? I will be forced to eat squishy bread. 

But back to Wally. 

Wally has actually been sick for a very long time, but I am a bad mother (this is why I'm not allowed to have children) and refused to take him to the doctor. Instead, I kept bandaging him up with tape and propping him up with book-pillows so that he'd turn on and stay on, until finally today, I decided I would take him in. The computer doctor said it could cost a couple of hundred dollars and that he'd call me to let me know once he'd done the assessment. And if I decide not to get him fixed, then it will cost me $60 for the assessment. Which seems like a ripoff, doesn't it? Although I think what it says is that unless they tell me it's going to cost $1,000 then I will give them my money to get Wally fixed and back home safely since I cannot buy a new computer for $60, unless it's Fisher Price and pink, which would be cute, but perhaps not effective for writing novels. I wish we had OHIP for computers, since I'm thinking I may have to eat pork n' beans for dinner to save my money for Wally and I hate beans. Though I'm pretty sure it's not actually cheaper to eat pork n' beans than it is to buy a box of cereal or a can of peas or corn or even a box of Kraft Dinner, which tastes a lot better but maybe whomever said pork n' beans were cheap said so before Kraft Dinner was invented. 

Anyway, I would eat pork n' beans for Wally. I'm sure he hates it at computer world, where he's stuck in a room filled with either really old computers that are hacking and coughing and about to die, or really slick new skinny computers that are making him feel like Nicole Richie in A Simple Life Season 1. I don't want Wally to get an eating disorder. Or to have to stay overnight, but the computer man still hasn't called to tell me what's wrong with him. I guess they're still running tests. I wonder if there are visitation hours like when Mr. Baz's penis got blocked and he couldn't pee and he had to stay overnight at the kitty hospital. We visited him every morning before work and every evening before bed. I think it helped take his mind off the Rottweiler that was in the bedroom next to him, staring at him, preparing to eat him when we turned our backs. If only Mr. Baz had had episodes of LOST to watch to take his mind off things, or a computer so he could Google Rottweilers and learn that no, they do not like to eat kitties. 

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Is it a sign?

Today, I was driving to meet a friend for lunch and that Alicia Keys song "No One" came on the radio. (Sidenote: I really had no idea what the song was called and was going to call it No One because she says that 17852 times in the song but I just Googled it and apparently that's actually what it's called. How straightforward of her.) was playing on the radio, only I'm sort of sick of it because I hear it all the time, so I changed the station without looking to preset 2. Only it was still playing. So I changed the station again to preset 3. And it was playing again. At which point I thought maybe some higher force had taken over my car and was making me either A only listen to that station or B only listen to that song. So then I madly (okay I didn't do it "madly" because there's no reason to go crazy when you're driving and besides it's not like it was Satan talking to me, it was just a song but it sounds dramatic to say "madly" doesn't it?) hit preset 4, 5 and 6 and different songs were playing on each of those presets. So then I realized that the higher force wasn't possessing my radio, but maybe Alicia Keys has a really good publicist. Or just a really good song, but still I thought there might be a hidden message in the song so I flipped back to preset 1 to listen to the words, and when the song ended I listened to the rest of the song on preset 2 and then preset 3 (or in some such order) but I couldn't figure out what the revelation was, except that if your song is really popular and gets played on several stations simultaneously your fans have the ability to listen to it for 9 minutes without break. I'm not sure it's really a revelation, which ended up being a good thing because how many revelations can you have in one day? Maybe just one, which is what happened next. 

After the final song ended, the commercial for the new movie One Missed Call came on the radio. If you haven't heard of it, the premise is that your cellphone rings telling you that you have missed a call (but it's not their ring tone) and when you listen to the message, it's from your future self, telling you the details of your own death. At first, all I could think about was that I DEFINITELY can't see this movie - I mean, my LIFE is ONE MISSED CALL because my cellphone NEVER rings. I would NEVER sleep again. Either that, or I'd have to cancel my voicemail and then what good would my phone be? Anyway, after I got over that I got to thinking that the movie sounded really familiar. Like The Ring, part 2. Except there already was a Ring, part 2. So it's a remake. Except the Ring was a remake, so I guess it's just like Deep Impact was to Armageddon. 

Which was when I realized why The Ring was called The Ring. 

I saw this movie. And the sequel. The original was the first movie date I went on with The Hubs. And at the end of the movie I just couldn't figure out why it was called The Ring. I kept waiting for there to be a wedding ring or a halo. Something. And then, when the sequel came out I wanted to ask The Hubs why it was called that, like maybe I was missing something. But I was sure he was just going to laugh at me, because how could I have watched a movie and then, like 3 years later ask why it's called The Ring.

And now, I JUST got it. 

I'm trying not to look on the glum side, which would be that I'm really dense. I'm trying to think that maybe 2008 will be a year of revelations, and this is just the teaser. 

Please tell me you've had a similar experience...with something. Anything. Please? 

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Why do today what you could put off until next year?

Yesterday, I awoke in a panic of all the things I had to do before the end of the year.

Like what? The Hubs asked.

Well... I wanted to finish the three books I had on the go so that I could get my final tally of books read this year up to 25, since I was currently sitting at 22 after finishing How to Be Good by Nick Hornby (good read!) a while ago. Other than that, well, I didn't know what else I wanted to do, but I felt like I should do more things on the final day of the year. Instead, I went to the golf dome and then ate some leftover turkey (although eating leftovers seems like an accomplishment, right?). Then, I thought, why not go to the mall. What bad can come of finishing the year off by shopping? I was looking for a new dayplanner, which I thought, would at least inspire me to write down all the things I would do the following day, on the first day of the year. And then I had an epiphany. I would get a new phone. I LOVE my phone. It's a Chocolate, and it's so cute, but pretty much sucks. Last Christmas I begged for it, and got it, and now wish I would've stuck with my no frills/no colour/no camera phone that actually rings when someone calls. But today, I thought, I will put up with it no longer (after saying for a year that I should actually take it to the Rogers store but never did). I would take care of this, once and for all. So I went to the Rogers kiosk, where the guy asked me what was wrong and I told him -- that the phone doesn't ring, only sporadically lets me know when there are messages, and my ear presses buttons randomly when I try to talk on it. To which he told me that if I'd come anytime this year, I could've gotten the phone fixed, but because I'd waited a whole year, the warranty had now expired. And I still had 2 years on the plan. Because of course, I signed up for the 3 year plan. But I looovoed the phone. I thought I'd love it in 3 years! What's 3 years, really? It seems like no time at all. How could I not love my Chocolate phone in 3 years? I'm such an idiot. The worst part is that because I wanted the Chocolate phone last year I had to pay to cancel my other cellphone plan a year early (because of course I thought I'd love THAT phone for 3 years too, but somehow I fell out of love with it, too). So now, my only options were to upgrade my phone for $250, which is so ridiculous. Apparently even if the phones under the glass say $99 that's only if you start a new plan, not if you want to trade in your phone midway through your plan. My other option was to buy a new phone and put the SIM card in it. I don't even understand how this works (how much does it cost to buy a phone? Isn't that what I'd be doing to upgrade or would it be even more?). So I went with option 3: Why do today what I could do next year? I mean, I put up with a phone that doesn't ring for one year, I figured I might as well put up with it for another year. And then, after that I'll just have one more year to go. So then I left the kiosk with my cute and crappy phone in hand and went and bought myself a pretty party dress to go on my new year's eve date and then I ate some candy because my new year's resolution is to not eat candy (at least, on a daily basis). So I figured I should at least have some before I go cold turkey.

So I didn't get a new phone, and I didn't finish reading any of the books that I started. But you know what I realized? When I DO finish reading those 3 books, I'll already be well on my way to my new goal for 2008, which is to read 36 books, or 3 a month. So, I guess the Hubs was right. There ARE some benefits to procrastinating until next year after all. It makes you feel even more accomplished!