Beauty Tuesday: Obi Wan Kinoki

Have you seen the infomercial for these?

The other day, the Hubs went to the mall to renew our license plates. He came home with the Kinoki Detox Foot Pads. "The registration kiosk is beside the As Seen On TV store," was his justification.

Secretly, I was so excited to try them. I feel like anything that's Seen on TV is a scam of some sort. But I really wanted to believe these would work. I mean, who doesn't want to get the toxins sucked from the soles of their feet while they sleep?

Here's what you do. You take one sticky strip and attach the detox pad, then stick it to the sole of your foot, then repeat on the other foot. Then you put socks on so the toxins don't get all over your sheets. You wear them all night. In the morning you remove the pads. They're brown, disgusting and smelly. And so, so satisfying because you think you're pulling the toxins right out of your body.

Apparently, you're supposed to keep using the pads every other night until they're not as dark anymore (ie you're toxin-free). We used the pads for one week, until we ran out of pads. They were still turning brown.

"We must be really toxic," the Hubs said. I agreed. That must be it.

I bought another box. At the As Seen on TV store, I asked the guy behind the counter if he thought they really worked.

"For sure," he said convincingly.

"Have you tried them?"

"No, but a guy who works here swears by them. He used them for like a month."

"A month? But each box is only a two-week supply. You're supposed to be toxic-free by the end of the two weeks."

"I guess he was really toxic."

"So did the pads run clear by the end? Is that why he stopped using them?"

"Oh, I don't know."

"Aren't they supposed to run clear?"

"I'm not sure. I don't think they ever get totally clear."

"Then how do you know when you're toxin-free?"

"Um, I'm not sure..." He started to look uncomfortable, like I might not want to buy the box anymore. But he was wrong. I was determined to prove that these weren't a scam. Because really, I wanted to believe that they work.

We applied the pads every other night for another week. Still brown and smelly.

"I think we need to wet one and see what happens," the Hubs said.

But I didn't want to. Because I knew what was going to happen.

We poured water from the tap onto a fresh pad. It turned brown.

"I guess the water must be toxic," I declared.

Even so, we're still wearing the pads. We're addicted. We call them Obi Wan Kinokis because it's fun to say and they're fun to use.

I just watched this report on 20/20. They found some lead in the used pads they tested. They're not convinced it came from testers' feet, but perhaps just from their apartment floors. I'm choosing to believe the lead was just one of the toxins released into the pads from the testers' feet. Call me an optimist, but I like the pads. They make me feel good and like I'm being healthy. It's a small price to pay. I know I should stop but I can't.