STOP MESSING WITH MY CHOCOLATE.

Let's discuss Fruity Smarties for a minute, please. Now, I LOVE Smarties. Some people are indifferent between Smarties and M&Ms. Some people don't think there's a difference. There's a huge difference. HUGE. I mean, first of all there are the colours. Then there's the shape - flat Smarties versus round Skittle-like M&Ms. Then, there's the TASTE. Smarties are made with milk chocolate. M&Ms are made with semi-sweet chocolate. And while yes, Smarties will melt in your hand, they'll also melt in your mouth. I cannot make an M&M melt in my mouth. The candy coating is just too thick, which is good if you're looking to hold the M&Ms in your hand for a while, but since I have no will power I pretty much eat them instantly and I CAN'T wait for them to melt, so I have to crunch them and then I'm just chewing on chocolate and that's just not right. Because you can really only enjoy chocolate if you're letting it melt in your mouth.

So when I saw these I felt torn. It's like when someone asks if you'd like dessert and then they offer you applesauce. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with applesauce, I LIKE applesauce, but it's not dessert. Neither is fruit. I am trying to eat more fruit, but it's not dessert. Chocolate is dessert. Which is why Fruity Smarties aren't Smarties at all! They're Skittles.

I like Skittles, but we already have Skittles. And Skittles are sort of guilt-free candy, because you know they're fat-free so you don't feel so bad about eating them. But with Fruity Smarties, it's like if I reach for the Smarties, I'm going to feel like I SHOULD have the Fruity Smarties instead.

Of course, I SHOULD have a piece of fruit instead. Preferably organic, or at least locally-grown, right?