How to MC a wedding

Last weekend I was an MC.


Not that kind of MC.

The kind at a wedding. The Master of Ceremonies. Or, as I like to call it, The Mistress of Ceremonies.

Luckily, my initials are MC, so it wasn't at all confusing when people would call out "Hey MC!". I'm lying. Not a single person hollered that. But at the end of the night, some drunk guy was like "Hey, there goes the DJ!" to me as I walked by him on the dance floor. I didn't have the heart to tell him that the DJ was the one sitting behind the table, mixing music on his iPods. I guess he was confused by the lack of turntable action.

Anyway, I always think of MCs as guys. And funny. I'm neither, but then I remembered that my sister and sister-in-law were actually my co-MCs at my wedding so clearly I didn't think our MC had to be a guy. Or even just one guy. When I was preparing, I thought about what they did, to try to get some inspiration. At our destination wedding, though, their biggest task was to ensure no fat, bald guys in Speedos tried to sneak their way into the ceremony area or get caught in the background of any photos. So perhaps not really relevant, though it was the May 24 weekend, on a golf course, with a winery onsite and an open bar, so I didn't underestimate the reality that some people might decide to pound back a 2-4 and strip down.

Luckily, no one did, although I like to think they were going to, until I told them I'd kick their butt during my speech. So really I stopped them in their tracks. Go me. Either way, no embarrassing moments for the bride, and the most embarassing part was only when I explained how to get the bride and groom to suck face (aka the kissing game). My father appeared slightly mortified by my choice of words. Oh, Dad...